empty net specialist

what the fuck;;;


(im sammi)

i just finished the last season of dexter and i have never felt so empty

hellyeahyums:

the-gingerdancer:

sextronautt:

how can lawyers argue without crying 

or swearing

if i went into a courtroom i’d be all

now you fucking listen here you little cumslut 

"he has been found guilty

"HA IN YOUR FUCKING FACES, BITCHES."

(via lifeguardinthesharktank)

stcroixx:

"whispers* sign john moore
*silently weeps into your morning cup of coffee* sign john moore
*lays down in utter despair* SIGN JOHN MOORE

(via littleblackfadedmoon)

jumping on the bandwagon before it rolls away

(via dont-puck-with-me)

gacob:

they were right. guns don’t kill people. people kill people. people are now illegal and the crime rate is zero

(via officialpepperoni)

dokibots:

haha! have fun at highschool today NERDS. i’m gonna be doing cool ADULT stuff like sleeping WHENEVER i want and CRYING 

(via timllincecum)

nietzscheisdead:

six things every girl will ALWAYS have in her purse:

  1. another smaller purse
  2. an aging picture of ringo starr
  3. a six pack of heineken 
  4. the complete box set of every season of Deadliest Catch
  5. the hat you thought you lost at Disneyland when you were 5
  6. a tiny, infinitely dense marble that contains our own universe

(via phantomofthearena)

allmymetaphors:

ppl always ask me “”what are you going to do with your degree”“ and “"if you wanna get a PHD how do you plan on paying for it"" and ""where are you gonna move after college"" but here is the thing:

i am very powerful and cute and im gonna float through this world one day at a time. please leave me alone. 

(via anttiraanta)

unclefather:

when you did something by yourself and you want people to know who did it

unclefather:

when you did something by yourself and you want people to know who did it

(via broadwayjoeshirts)

breadstiks:

it’s physically impossible to fit words into a venn diagram

(via ohhossanight)

  • teacher: do u understand what ur supposed to be doing
  • me: yeh
  • friend: what r we supposed to be doin
  • me: lol idk

invaderotaku:

kalliat:

how do boys actually dry their ducks after they shower like

do you just grab it in the towel and roll it between your hands like a dough snake

or do you swing it around to air dry

I need to know

image

(via phantomofthearena)